The World's Worst Handyman

Mechanically Challenged

I should be enjoying my NFL football game today but apparently that is not in the cards. My wife discovered that our front door had jammed. When I went to investigate I found that the door lock was indeed jammed. The only way she was going to get out the front door was if I removed the lock entirely. I tried removing the lock set from inside the house. This was a waste of time. I had no alternative but to go out through the back yard. The problem with the backyard is that the back gate is locked also. I have to keep a U-lock on my back gate door so that I dogs don't run out of the yard. The only other way I can get out the back door is with the use of the step ladder and chair. If I was younger I suppose I could just jump over the fence. But with my bad knees this would probably not be a wise idea to attempt this. So I went into the house to find the keys for my U- lock. I went around the front and was finally able to detach the door lock set.

 Let me first point out that I am not a handyman in any sense of the word. They have a show on TV called the world's worst handyman. If I were ever to compete on the show I would win hands down. My father before me was also not a handyman. He didn't fix anything around the house. So therefore I learned zilch about fixing things. When I started living in mobile homes and eventually a real house, I discovered that things seem to break down regularly. Previously I had lived in apartments and this was not a problem as you could just call the landlord. When you own your own place there is no landlord or supervisor to call. There is however Handyman Connection. This company can send someone out to your house to fix your problem for a price of course. When I have resorted to this strategy I have always felt incompetent and guilty later especially when I had to fork over money from my wallet. The thought occurs to me that if I wasn't so damn stupid I could've fixed the damn thing myself and saved a bundle of money. In some ways I have come a long way. Up until the last 10 years if I saw something that needed fixing around the house I would usually wait until it was absolutely necessary to get it fixed. I usually wouldn't hesitate to call the handyman. I might look at the repair for a few seconds myself and then decide that it was way too hard for me. In present times I will actually attempt to do the repair myself. I once had a pastor pray for me that I would be able to fix things. The prayer seems to work to some extent. Now when I see a problem if it doesn't look dangerous I will first attempt to repair it myself. Sometimes I succeed and sometimes I don't. Sometimes I make the problem worse because of my own efforts. But I have the satisfaction of saying at least I tried.